If Heaven Can Wait.

Virginia Gillham is Associate Librarian in the Public Service Library at
the University of Guelph.

At barely 30 years of age, author Heather (Deedee) Sanderson made the decision to put her life and career on hold for an indeterminate length of time while she acted as caregiver to her beloved grandmother as that determined, 93-year-old lady navigated the final stages of Alzheimer’s disease.

An obviously insightful, philosophical thinker, Sanderson understood the need to preserve her own physical and mental health as the experience unfolded. Thankfully for us all, one of the therapies she chose was to keep a diary of the entire experience. In not much more than 100 pages, this amazing little book achieves the status of diary, record of philosophical musings, description of unconditional love, critique of the health care system and bureaucracy, and advice manual for others dealing with Alzheimer’s. Its relevance and appeal are broad.

Lenore Sanderson was an independent, determined woman of substance. She fought back from the status of abused wife to that of proud, successful, single mother and, ultimately, fun-loving, adventurous, fiercely independent human being. The photographs in this volume indicate a physical resemblance between Lenore and her granddaughter. The narrative demonstrates that Deedee is also a woman of substance.

Much of this story is told in stream of consciousness fashion as the harrowing demands of providing care for an unpredictable Alzheimer’s patient beat relentlessly on the author. At intervals she finds time to digress into brief but telling descriptions of Lenore as she was, and to pay tribute to the many who provided welcome assistance to Deedee and this final version of Lenore. While she never chooses to pontificate on the shortcomings of the health care system, her wry observations of her experiences speak volumes. Though she spends almost no time discussing her feelings for her grandmother, her actions and her analysis of her grandmother’s actions demonstrate a level of love and sacrifice not often found in intergenerational family relationships.

This book belongs in most libraries and is a must-read for anyone pondering family relationships or dealing with an Alzheimer’s patient.