Courtship, Love and Marriage in Nineteenth-Century English Canada

R. Douglas Francis is a professor of History at the University of
Calgary and author of Images of the Canadian West.

Today courtship, love, and marriage are very personal and private
affairs. Such was not always the case, however, according to Ward. In
nineteenth-century English-speaking Canada these events were very
public, shaped by clearly defined and well-understood religious beliefs
and by the law, but most importantly by social customs and societal
values.

Courtship, Love and Marriage . . . is a highly readable account of how
attitudes toward love and marriage changed in the nineteenth century.
Change came, Ward argues, through an evolutionary rather than a
revolutionary process. No one event or date can be seen as the turning
point.

Ward chronicles these changes very well. He is less successful at
explaining why they occurred, and at analyzing their importance in
understanding nineteenth-century English-Canadian society. He does,
however, suggest three important areas where his research might
challenge conventional theories about English-Canadian society. He
questions the thesis of labor historians that a distinct and unique
working class culture existed in the nineteenth century. “The rituals
of Canadian romance had little to do with class,” he concludes. He
also challenges woman historians who argue that women experienced low
status in the nineteenth century. Changes in courtship, love, and
marriage practices, he writes, “increased the autonomy, improved the
life chances, and raised the civil status of women throughout English
Canada.” Finally he doubts the existence of the sharp cultural
boundaries and practices that ethnic historians have argued existed in
the nineteenth century. Instead he argues that “the courtship and
marriage rituals . . . formed part of an emerging Anglo-Canadian popular
culture” that cut across ethnic lines.

Courtship, Love and Marriage . . . sheds new light on an important and,
to date, neglected area of Canadian social history. Until we learn more
about how people interacted in private, we cannot understand the
attitudes that they brought to their public lives. Certainly courtship,
love, and marriage are fundamental areas of personal interaction that
can offer insight into this private sphere and through it to the values,
norms, and beliefs of a society.

Ward’s book provides a valuable beginning to an understanding of
nineteenth-century English-Canadian society. But it remains a beginning
only. His research, while impressive, is still highly selective; his
conclusions, while perceptive, are based on too limited knowledge. We
see love, courtship practices, and marriage only through the eyes of a
small and select group. Furthermore, Ward accepts at face value the
thoughts of this select group. Even when people reflect in private on
their personal experiences, they do so selectively. We know enough about
the violence, the brutality, the sexual perversions, and the demonic
nature of nineteenth-century Canadian society to realize that not all
marriages were made in heaven, all thoughts on sex morally uplifting,
and all courtships demure. One might come away from Ward’s book
thinking otherwise. Still, the book is a valuable contribution to a new
and exciting area of Canadian social history.