Fitting In

Sheree Haughian is an elementary-school teacher-librarian in
Orangeville, Ontario.

Growing up Jewish in a small Canadian city in the early 1960s begins as
a cosmetic matter for Mollie. Prompted by her friend, Phyllis, Mollie
starts to wonder if her nose is too big and her dark hair too curly. The
other girls in the public school Mollie, Phyllis, and Naomi attend seem
all peaches and cream and golden, cheerleader types from milk
commercials. Rigorous mirror inspection is a ritual for girls of their
age. Then, as now, young females seemed to feel forever flawed,
testaments to the body inadequate. Only the icons of perfection have
changed in 30 years.

But for the young women in Fitting In, the quest for identity comes to
be more profound. When day lessons end, the girls spend time at the
Hebrew School that is associated with the Orthodox synagogue to which
their families belong. At a special movie screening, they learn about
the genocide of 6 million Jews in Europe. Miraculously, the girls have
reached advanced childhood without having heard about the Holocaust.
Innocence lost, Mollie finds evidence of anti-Semitism all around her:
in the blue concentration-camp digits on the forearm of a member of the
congregation; in the cruel chants and pranks of neighborhood children
who brand Jews as Christ killers.

Much of what Mollie feels is left uncommunicated to the outside world.
Her friend, Naomi, is equally secretive about another deeply disturbing
matter. This silence, perhaps characteristic of the way emotional
experience remained private a generation ago, also serves as an emblem
of unspeakable evil. Fitting In is a subtle, powerful novel about the
way personal identity is shaped by cultural memory. Highly recommended.