Time-in Parenting: How to Teach Children Emotional Self-Control, Life Skills, and Problem Solving by Lending Yourself and Staying Connected

Elizabeth Levin is a professor of psychology at Laurentian University.

Most parents today have heard of (if not used, time-out) a disciplinary
strategy that comes from the behavioristic branch of psychology. This
book presents an alternative approach to child rearing, based on the
psychoanalytic tradition, known as time-in. In time-out, an angry parent
may send a misbehaving child to her room, thereby conveying the message
that the child is so bad that the parent does not want to be with her.
In time-in, by contrast, the parent holds the child, talks with the
child about her feelings, and models self-control in dealing with anger.
The goal is not only to enable the child to express her emotions, but to
teach her how to handle those emotions. In doing so, she borrows her
parent’s strength, developing a self-control that will help her deal
with life’s problems as she matures.

You do not require a strong background in psychology to understand this
lucidly written book. The author supports and elucidates her theory with
many examples drawn from her experiences of helping children and
families. There is much that parents can gain from using time-in with
their children.